Muhammad Ali Impersonation: “Why is Jesus White?” (My Own Voice)

This is my impersonation on Muhammad Ali’s interview in London 1971 when he talked about the dynamic of whites and blacks in United States of Amerika.

My Impersonation: Muhammad Ali – Why is Jesus White?

Things are getting much better but I always wonder when I went to church on sunday, I’ve always been wanted to… I’m not just a boxer. I do a lot of readings, a lot of studyings, I go out, ask questions, and travel these countries, I watch how other people lives, and I learn.

And I always ask my mother, I said “Mother! how come is everything white? why is Jesus white with blonde hair and blue eyes? why the lord’s supper all white men? angels are white, pope, and Mary and even the angels”

I said “mother, when we die do we go to heaven?” she said “yeah naturally we go to heaven?”.

I said “well what happen to all the black angels when they took the pictures?” And I said “ooh I know, if the white folks were in the heaven too, and the black angels were in the kitchen, preparing the milk and honey?”

She said “listen you quit saying that!”. But I was always curious. And I always wonder why I had to die to go to heaven. Why I couldn’t have pretty cars and good money and nice homes now?

Why do I have to wait till I die to get the milk and honey. And I said “Mama I don’t want no milk and honey, I like steaks, and I said milk and honey is laxative anyway. Do they have a lot of bedrooms in heaven?”

I always wonder why you know Tarzan is the king in the jungle in Africa but he was white. I saw this white man swinging around in Africa with a diaper on hollerin ‘HUAAAAA’, and all the Africans he’s beating them up and breaking the lion’s jaw. And here’s Tarzan talking to the animals, but the Africans been there for centuries, and they can’t yet talk to the animals. Only Tarzan can talk to the animals.

I always wonder why Miss America was always white, Ms. World was always white, and Ms. Universe was always white. Then they got some stuff called white house cigars, white swan soap, king white soap, white cloud tissue paper, white rain hair spray, white tornado flo wax, everything was white.

And the angel food cake was the white cake, and the devil food cake was the chocolate cake. I said “Mama, why is everything white?”

I always wondered you know. And the President live in the White House!

Everything good was white, Santa clause was white.

But everything bad was black. The little ugly duckling was a black duck, and the black cat was a bad luck, and if I threaten you I’m gonna blackmail you. I said “Mama why don’t they call it white mail, they lie too?”

So I was always curious and then this is when I knew something was wrong.

When I went the Olympic gold medal in Rome, Italy. Olympic champion, the Russian stand right here and the Poland stand right here. Is Poland considered the communist country?

Yeah, I’m defeatin America’s so called threats or enemies, and the flag was going, ‘ten ten tenn tenn tenn ten’, I’m standing so proud, ‘tennn tenn tennn tennn tenn tennn’ I whoop the world for America ‘tenn tenn tennn tennn tenn tennn’.

I took my gold medal, thought I invented something, I said maan I know I’m gonna get my people’s freedom now I’m the champion of the whole world, Olympic champion I know I can eat downtown now.

And I went downtown that day, I had my big ‘Ol medal and went in a restaurant. See at that time, things weren’t integrated, the black folks couldn’t eat downtown.

And I went downtown and I sat down and I said, “Uhh, a cup of coffee, a hot dog.…” He said, the lady said (Ali puts on a falsetto), “We don’t serve Negroes.” And I was so mad, I said, “I don’t eat ‘em either! Just give me a cup of hot coffee and a hamburger!”

You know, I said “I’m the Olympic Gold Medalist, won three days ago, went out and fought for this country in Rome, I won the Gold Medal, and I’m gonna eat!” — I heard her tell the manager, she says, he says, “Well, I’m not, I’m not the man to—he’s got to go out,” and anyway I didn’t raise it up and they put me out.

And I had to leave that restaurant in my hometown where I went to church and served in their Christianity and fought in—my daddy fought in all the wars—just won a gold medal, and couldn’t eat downtown, and I said, “Something’s wrong.” And from then on, I’ve been a Muslim.


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